Healing Insecurity

Insecurity is simply no fun. It often tags along unwanted and many times unnoticed. I have struggled with it, more during some seasons than others. I know I'm not the only one with insecurities. We ALL have them, men and women, some are plagued by insecurity more then others. I am learning to be aware of my insecurities, to recognize insecurity when it appears, to address it, to dig into it, to refuse it, to allow God to heal my heart and mind through it, and to find true security in God alone. It's not easy, it's tough work, but it's worth every moment. If you struggle with insecurity I challenge you to open yourself to God, in blunt honesty, and allow Him to change you.

Dear God,

I come to You this moment because I need some things only You can give me. I need restoration. I need my dignity back. You alone know what insecurity has cost me, what trouble-even torment-it has caused me. You are intimately acquainted with every time it’s made a fool of me. I desperately need and want to be delivered from my insecurity. I am ready to discover what it means to be truly secure. I am willing to do whatever it takes to be free and to allow You to do through me what I cannot do by myself. You are the all-powerful, all-knowing Maker of heaven and earth and the grand Weaver of every human soul. You alone know how I am made and who I am meant to be. You know the way I’m formed. You know what motivates me. You know what shuts me down. You know how driven I am by fear and how exhausted I am from surrendering to it. Deliver me. You have not given me a spirit of fear but of power, love, and a sound mind. Your desire is for me to be free of every unhealthy motivation. You have searched the deepest recesses of my heart and mind. I don’t need to hide anything from You or act stronger or more together than I am. Help me to come before You with complete transparency, and grant me confidence that I am safe with You and loved by You. I don’t have to fake feelings I don’t posses or hang my head in defeat and shame. Because of Your grace, I can come to You just as I am. You know me better than I know myself. You know why I think like I do and why I feel like I do. You know my every thought and every disappointment. You know every ugly or stupid thing I’ve ever said or done out of insecurity. You see into my soul, and You look beyond my failures to the depth of my need. Reveal Yourself to me. Give me insight into patterns I’ve developed, and give me answers that bring healing. Make me wholly unafraid of anything that I might see in myself in Your light. Help me to trust that You only shed light where You’re willing to heal. You know the complexities of my soul and that most of the time I can’t even figure myself out. Help me take responsibility for the insecurity that is my own fault. My own sin. I am painfully aware that at times I’ve created my own misery. As I confess, Your desire is my freedom, not my self-condemnation, so with confidence, I welcome the one and reject the other.

Please forgive me for my self-worship. For my relentless pursuit of control and for my futile attempts at doing Your job. Forgive me for my foolish pride. Forgive me for my miserable self-absorption. Forgive me for the jealousies that feed my insecurity. Forgive me for turning too many things into competitions. For being so focused on what I don’t have that I leave the gifts You’ve given me untouched and much less effective than You intended them to be. Forgive me for thinking so little of the person You’ve made me. Forgive me for despising myself and considering myself inferior to others. Forgive me for every time I’ve sighed with relief at the thought that I might be superior. Forgive me for my unbelief. If I realized how valuable I am, my need for affirmation would be quieted. Forgive me for being such a perfectionist that I resist doing something good out of fear that it won’t be great. Forgive me for self-protection that has only managed to imprison me. Convict me until I’m instantly aware when insecurity is my own fault. Help me to recognize any form of pride or unbelief and to refuse it immediately.Pull up the causes of insecurity that were not of my own doing, and bring healing and restoration. You know every single place where instability has touched my life. You know the rational origin of every irrational fear. I give You my whole heart. Touch every broken and wounded place with Your healing hand. Empower me to forgive those who have let me down, failed to protect me, or inflicted injury upon me. Help me to see them as needy, broken people in their own right, and where there is still life and opportunity, bring redemption to those relationships. Help me to understand that if I do not seek healing and wholeness, I will instead end up continuing the cycle of injury. Break the cycle with me. Be my gain. Flood my life with purpose and compassion. Be my strength in weakness. Don’t stop until You’ve made a miracle of me. Help me to learn how to hang on tight to You when my life is rocked by dramatic change. Empower me to trust You and not to panic or fight for control. Help me to stop confusing a change in my circumstances with a change in my security status. You are my security. You are the one sure thing. When everything around me shakes, You are unshakable. Nothing reveals my false gods to me like a sudden change in my circumstances. Help me to see them and surrender them instantaneously. Use change to bring what needs changing in me and to increase my appreciation for the only One who is the same yesterday, today, and forever.

You entrusted to me my physical and psychological makeup: personal limitations, my appearance, and my God-given disposition. You knew what You were doing when you formed me in my mother’s womb. Nothing is without purpose. Nothing has thrown off the plan. Every gift, challenge, and obstacle is meant to shape the specific destiny You ordained for me before time began. Your intent is to make a wonder out of me and show what You can do through me. You mean to increase the praise that comes to You because of my life. You want to defy the odds in order to make Yourself known in me. Please deliver me from self-pity and a life of excuses and rationalizations. Help me to see where I am overly sensitive and where I put too much pressure on relationships. Help me to see where I insist on making a situation all about me. Remind me that I am capable of great transformation with You. Deliver me from insecurity in my relationships. Help me to stop being to easily wounded, but at the same time, keep my heart from becoming hard. Help me to realize that it’s pointless to demand that others love me more or love me better. Real affection cannot be forced. I cannot put any human in charge of my security without setting him or her up for certain failure. Help me to stop using a person as my mirror and start seeing myself as You alone see me. In the midst of all these requests, I thank You with my whole heart for working so diligently in my life. There have been people who have hurt me and have done a very poor job of taking Your place, but there have also been people who have shown me glimpses of You. Not perfect people, but genuine people. I thank you for them.

I thank you for all You have done to get me to this place and for the plan You have ahead of me. Please restore all that insecurity has stolen from me. Turn every single thing the enemy meant for evil into something good. Perform a miracle on me. Cover me with Your trustworthy hand. Clothe me with strength and dignity. Transform what drives me. Quiet what triggers me. Make me a courageous woman. Make me into the kind of woman a little girl could follow to dignity and security. I receive everything that I have requested in You this day. Let this seep into every corner of my life and invade my entire belief system. I take my dignity back. No one and nothing can take it from me because You are the One who gave it. Help me to recognize that I’ve lost my dignity only because I have surrendered it. Empower me to claim it back and hang on to it with all my might. Because of Your mercy, I am no fool. Only a wise woman shifts her trust to You!

In Jesus Name....